Tackling Restaurants

January 19, 2013

47 pounds to go

Disclaimer #1:  I eat out a lot.  This works.

Disclaimer #2:  Two instructional blogs in a row, I know.  It can get a little tedious.  Do eat vegetables.  Don't eat pie.  Do move your ass.  Don't get hung up about it.  Do dance like a chicken.  Don't eat the beak.  To make this fun I'm going to play "where's the yeti."  He's hidden somewhere in this blog.  If you pay attention long enough you'll be able to spot him among the details.

Restaurants can seem tough at first glance.  Their objective is to have you leave fat and happy, not healthy and spry.  They focus on your experience -- which includes lots of food.  This is why they push the bread,  extra drinks, appetizers and oh, by the way "do you have room for dessert?"  And you hrmm for a second and say "Yeeahh, bring me the pie."  2600 calories, one enormous dump and a beaching session later I force Mike to push me up the stairs because there's no way I'm going to make it on my own.  

Do the calories count if I just lick the food?

There are a few leg-work details that are helpful with restaurants.  First, with the Affordable Care Act, any restaurant chain that has more than 20 locations is required to list their calorie counts.  Another interesting detail with the '20 locations or more status': the calories have to be listed next to the standard menu item.  I have noticed at some chains such as Claim Jumpers and Bucca Di Beppo (huge calorie offenders) they keep a separate nutritional menu on the table, and it's not listed on the menu.  Legal?  I think not.  But they're getting away with it for now and at least we have easy access to the information.  Also, when looking at the calorie listings often there will be a range of "600-850*" calories next to a combo meal at a fast food place.  Then you look at the asterisk and it will say "does not include x,y,z."  I am shocked at what some restaurants get away with using this technicality.  I was at Ruby's Diner the other day and next to the hamburger meal it said "650 - 850*"  I asked if the upwards 850 included the fries.  The waitress didn't know.  I risked the meal and looked it up later and the nutritional menu said (I shit you not) "Hamburger listing does not include MEAT."  How can you not include the fucking hamburger in the hamburger???"  So bread and sauce is 650 calories?  Oh wait.  I see, it's only 900 calories if I eat it.   Another one of my favorite technicality listings was at Boudin bread bakery.  I looked up the chicken caesar salad - their asterisk said "does not include meat or dressing."  So, this 262 calories consists of croutons, cheese and lettuce?  The takeaway from this is pay attention.  You may have to add some extra calories for what should be on the original listing.

If the restaurant chain has less than 20 locations, you're on your own with nutritional listings.  They're not required to tell you anything.  Some of them do, some of them don't so it doesn't hurt to ask.  I'm hoping as health care law progresses everyone will have to list everything.  The key is awareness.  I don't care if someone wants to eat a 3500 calorie meal, but they should at least have the chance to know what they're putting in their face.  So what do you do? The great thing with MyFitnessPal is that it does have a lot of general calorie listings.  So if you go to a Japanese restaurant you can look up "rainbow roll" and know it has 476 calories.  Yeti.  If I'm at an italian restaurant I can look up "feta stuffed chicken" and get an estimate.  It's not perfect, but it will help you make good decisions.  As with anything, with practice you'll start to get to know the default caloric properties of food so you'll get better at estimating.  2/3 of a dry cup of pasta is 210 calories.  A chicken breast is 133 calories.  An egg is 70 calories.  You'll do a lot of deferring to MyFitnessPal in the beginning but you get my drift.

The last item with prep work for a restaurant -- try to look up the menu online before you go.  That way you can pour over your choices and pick the best option without looking like Mrs. Indecision at the restaurant.  You'll know about the asterisks and be prepared with the questions you can't find the answers to.

When I first get my menu at the restaurant, oftentimes I'll warn the waiter that "I'm a modifier" that way they don't get annoyed when I ask for dressing on the side or how many ounces are in the bowl versus cup of soup.  Some servers know their menu, others don't.  Don't get mad if they give you a deer in the headlights look when you ask weird questions.  It also doesn't hurt to ask if they have a hidden 'healthy options' menu.  I've been surprised at how many restaurants have a 'secret' menu that has meals for 650 calories or less.   Some of my typical modifier remarks are "dressing on the side,"  "no croutons," and "make it without butter" (this applies to pasta dishes mostly).  I also will ask for a side of what I'm craving or something healthy that's not on the menu.  Like a side of steamed broccoli, black beans or fruit.  I have ordered a side of bananas before.  The waitress thought I was weird, but she'll live.  And I wanted the banana.

Now comes the toughest part of eating out: the actual eating.  Some restaurants there are just no good choices.  Everything is high.  And everything looks amazing.  In these cases, I'll order what I want and just eat half of what's served.  In the beginning this was very hard for me.  Especially knowing that I want it all, all the time.  When the food arrives, I'll draw a line in the middle, or cut it in half so I know when I have to stop.  I cut my food up into tiny pieces so it lasts longer.  I've heard of some women who ask the server to serve them half the meal and put the other half in a to-go box.  I haven't had the nerve to try this, but I would imagine that it's helpful if you don't have the willpower to stop.  Once I get down to the "I'm done eating" stage but that half meal is still there, I have to take extreme measures.  I move the plate to the edge of the table.  I throw my napkin over it.  I ask the waiter to take it away.  I start offering it to other people at the table.  Like with everything else, it gets easier with practice. 

As a final note, I'll have a later chapter that goes into very specific detail on what restaurants I frequent and what I typically order.  As a sneak preview, the restaurants where I've found the best choices I've found are: Rubios, Subway, Mimi's Cafe, Jersey Mikes, Boudin Bakery, El Pollo Loco, Chipotle, Panera, Jimbo's, and Corner Bakery.  This does not mean everything on their menus are healthy, it just means they have more healthy options than most.  Bon Appetit!

Did you find George the Yeti?